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♥
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Explaining
Sorry for the very emo and cryptic posts lately guys.

I'm having a very rough patch and I'll liken it to walking underwater, trying my best to keep my head above the surface. In the past whenever I had a nervous breakdown I just slept and ate and slept but now, I still have to function about my daily life, do chores, homework, and go to college, without any family to support me and always having to use all my energy to keep up cheerfulness and so on in class. I don't want to burst into tears in college or anything.

I've lost my phone and Mum actually wants to dip into her savings for her cataract surgery just to buy me a new one cause she can't stand to see me so sad. I asked my parents to settle their mortgage, credit card and loans things first and I'll settle this myself as it is my own fault, but they insisted on helping me because they care about me. I've been very touched, I seriously thought they would be so angry at me that they wouldn't talk to me for days.

At times, no matter how hard i try, even on tiptoes, my head fails to break the surface and I can feel myself drowning in the metaphorical waters. I hope one day, either by myself or with help, I'll be able to pull myself out onto dry ground. Will someone pull me up? Because I can't keep treading water and gulping only occasional gasps of air. I want to WALK again.

It feels like I have cancer or something but can i ask all you guys to keep me in your prayers? =) 

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6 comments

&the time is 1:51 AM
posted by Ena ♥