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Sunday, March 18, 2012
To End
This is the first time I've really ever felt to kill myself. Usually, there's some sort of glimmer even in the despair, maybe suddenly thinking about something a friend said and laughing, but now?

Mum sat me down to ask me, did I do anything with him and is that why he dumped me. I said no we never did anything. She didn't appear to believe me. She asked me if I've been sleeping around and drinking. I said yes, I do drink but only when birthday parties with Guine them also there. She asked me if I've been sleeping over at friend's houses and also asked me to stop hanging out with EVERYONE but narrow down the list of people I hang out with. She said if you really have done it with him, you'll find it hard to lift your head up again.

It's so shameful to hear these words from Mom. I feel like I embarassed her, and everyone. That even home is somewhere I don't belong anymore. That it's all for nothing. At home, it's harder to hide your tears. I want to go back to Sunway and kill myself. That's all I want to do.

I've made too many mistakes.

0 comments

&the time is 2:29 AM
posted by Ena ♥