But of course, that would be quite naive and deluding myself wouldn't it? Truth is, everyone knows, a blog isn't your own personal space. You are never free to post what you like. You are afraid of the schools, the people, the crap government. People can criticise and insult you on your own space because they don't like what you are writing. There is no such thing as mind you own business anymore. I'm so tired of all these false pretences.
Cute, regular girl who goes home and blogs happily about her day, her musings and thoughts (as long as they fit into the million quotas set by the community and once again, crap schools and crap governments), as cyberspace freedom is simply a thing of the past. You can only blog in that way, or else some huge drama might ensue. You are not free to blog your personal opinions, as it might hurt others and whatnot. As they might leave derogatory comments on your blog which sucks and you feel pressured to remove them.
Freedom? Is there such a thing? In this country we live in, freedom is an illusion, nothing more. Our 'masyarakat' is nothing but a 17th century British town, happy faces and friendliness a mask for all the unpleasantness and judgement hidden inside, so much that Malaysian people have become a faceless mask of people with the SAME thoughts and opinions because the community simply doesn't allow you to post your own opinions.
No, when you do, they criticise. They tell you you are naive and wrong. They threaten you and embarrass you. To what extent? To conform you to their own personal bland standards of freedom and opinions. There is no such thing as freedom, as long as there are people with feelings, sensitive people, people who get angry, people who don't respect you because you didn't respect them by posting something, but then why did they read it in the first place?
They disrespect you because you disrespected them by posting things BY YOUR OWN ACCORD which they voluntarily read. Is it that wrong and disrespectful to have a mind and an opinion which they might not accept but what can they do about it? Can you really change someone's thoughts in their head? Now, you may say you leave comments because you are expressing YOUR own personal opinion, but truth is the purpose is to change your ideals. Is that really right? Isn't it wrong to try to change someone's ideals no matter how much they offend you?
You are free to post your own opinions. But when those opinions are read, you are forced to change your opinions. How free is that? Is it right to make someone suppress their personal feelings and musings?
It is a choice and right to post on your opinions.
It is a choice for others to read it.
It is a choice to feel offended and leave a comment.
It is a choice to let yourself be changed. It is your own fault, weakness and stupidity.
It is STUPID when you do change and you realise you don't even recognize yourself anymore.
So what if you are a better person supposedly? To crush your ideals to be a better person? You change your nose to look better. You are now a better-looking person. But you have changed your true self. You have conformed to a stereotype.
It is disgusting why some people do conform. I regret it too. For a better social life, thoughts and beliefs and opinions and freedom rights were sacrificed and suppressed. It is disgusting what schools and government is trying to do.
Always stand by your opinions no matter how much people oppose them. Everyone has their own opinions, you have yours for a REASON. Everything has a REASON. No one has the right to change you. That's just like saying "I don't like how dogs walk on four legs and attempt to change them". Everything has its reason for being, it is in every spiritual and whatnot beliefs in the world.
So, is there really freedom? Think about it.
Never let the haters change you and mould you differently. It is ok to change for your own natural accord but very wrong to change simply because you are weak and crumble under other's demands. You will look back and regret, and wonder what happened to the you that you once knew.
Your true spirit is gone. You have changed. You,a sarcastic person, change into a cutesy bubbly person because you won't make friends if you're not. You will look back and regret. You will lose your essence forever. You will never be able to be original again. You are weak and you will never bounce back ever again.
That is all I can say. Always stand up for yourself, and don't care what figures of authority try to force you into, a contrite mess of apologies. Don't feel cowered, that was my mistake. Now, am i truly happy? I have lost my original self. i don't recognize myself anymore.
I didn't change naturally, I was made to be this way. I didn't grow up and adapt and change based on experiences and wisdom which comes on age. I was a square peg shoved into a round hole and now I've been grinded round and I can never grasp my corners anymore. Now I'm just another one person. No longer an individual.
That is not what you want. That is what others want. Never change because others want you to. That is all. Don't make the same mistake I did.
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&the time is 2:16 PM
posted by Ena ♥
